Saturday, May 31, 2003
Please pass the existential angst and the mirror and a line of 80's optimism. . .
Just watched Rules of Attraction on DVD. Sort of shot some promo for it, which supposedly their PR people loved, so I figured I should see the actual flick sooner or later. I really liked the book when I read it, which was while I was attending a small New England university. I liked the book so much that I kept reading other books by Bret Easton Ellis with the notion that it was conceivable I would like another one. Generally, his characters have such ennui that I get bored and distracted part way through and am as unmotivated as his characters to finish their lives. Yes, there are a few hilarious moments in American Psycho, but they are early on and I finally got too bored to read every long-ass description of male cosmetic products and sex murders. And I was reading American Psycho on a really dull contract assignment, which I was grotesquely overqualified for, or I probably would have gotten less far into the book.
Still I loved Rules of Attraction. The movie didn't feel that related to the book. One of my favorite scenes in the book involves the main character trying dispiritedly to jerk off to Playboy and realizing that these women who once seemed sophisticated, older, and out of reach were now younger than he is. In the movie, he just makes a quick reference to jerking off to internet porn which didn't exist at the time the book was written. But either way it was an entertaining movie. Eric Stoltz gets a "hummer" and I've never seen Ian Somerhalder before, but damn is he fucking hot.
I think they should make a Scarface consummables game for Rules of Attraction the movie. Gotta drink Jack when the characters do, masturbate when they do, videotape fucking, abstain from meaningful sex, complain about the essential loneliness of the human condition when they do, do lines until you nose bleeds, and tell your game playing companions to act out the following scene from the movie:
Rupert: Ya want some coke?
Sean Bateman: Um. Sure.
Rupert: Then get some of your own, bitch!
Just watched Rules of Attraction on DVD. Sort of shot some promo for it, which supposedly their PR people loved, so I figured I should see the actual flick sooner or later. I really liked the book when I read it, which was while I was attending a small New England university. I liked the book so much that I kept reading other books by Bret Easton Ellis with the notion that it was conceivable I would like another one. Generally, his characters have such ennui that I get bored and distracted part way through and am as unmotivated as his characters to finish their lives. Yes, there are a few hilarious moments in American Psycho, but they are early on and I finally got too bored to read every long-ass description of male cosmetic products and sex murders. And I was reading American Psycho on a really dull contract assignment, which I was grotesquely overqualified for, or I probably would have gotten less far into the book.
Still I loved Rules of Attraction. The movie didn't feel that related to the book. One of my favorite scenes in the book involves the main character trying dispiritedly to jerk off to Playboy and realizing that these women who once seemed sophisticated, older, and out of reach were now younger than he is. In the movie, he just makes a quick reference to jerking off to internet porn which didn't exist at the time the book was written. But either way it was an entertaining movie. Eric Stoltz gets a "hummer" and I've never seen Ian Somerhalder before, but damn is he fucking hot.
I think they should make a Scarface consummables game for Rules of Attraction the movie. Gotta drink Jack when the characters do, masturbate when they do, videotape fucking, abstain from meaningful sex, complain about the essential loneliness of the human condition when they do, do lines until you nose bleeds, and tell your game playing companions to act out the following scene from the movie:
Rupert: Ya want some coke?
Sean Bateman: Um. Sure.
Rupert: Then get some of your own, bitch!
Friday, May 30, 2003
Just posted this to a community I just rejoined, but figured I might post it here too:
What they heck, I thought I would post something on-theme. This is a snapshot of Lunabella and my partner in mischief Forrest Black dueling with fuzzy bird puppets. This was shot in our booth where we were exhibiting for Blue Blood and SWAG and some other stuff. The puppets from Ugly Shyla and her mom were truly highlights of the experience.
What they heck, I thought I would post something on-theme. This is a snapshot of Lunabella and my partner in mischief Forrest Black dueling with fuzzy bird puppets. This was shot in our booth where we were exhibiting for Blue Blood and SWAG and some other stuff. The puppets from Ugly Shyla and her mom were truly highlights of the experience.
I was rear-ended in a car accident earlier this week and fuck but my neck hurts. Well, sort of the base of my neck and tippy top of my back to be specific. OW. Please pass the kava kava and epson salts. Gaia Herbs makes a high quality liquid herbal extract in an easy to swallow gelatin capsule by the way.
I can't decide if I should have the guy who hit the car just pay the bazillion dollars to fix the bumper or if I should go through the whole medical thing with his insurance. I hate to make someone else's insurance go up, but I sure feel horrible. Actually, emotionally I'm feeling pretty good -- perhaps from all the high quality kava kava -- but physically I feel like . . . well . . . like I've been in a car accident.
I can't decide if I should have the guy who hit the car just pay the bazillion dollars to fix the bumper or if I should go through the whole medical thing with his insurance. I hate to make someone else's insurance go up, but I sure feel horrible. Actually, emotionally I'm feeling pretty good -- perhaps from all the high quality kava kava -- but physically I feel like . . . well . . . like I've been in a car accident.
Thursday, May 29, 2003
Wednesday, May 28, 2003
This is a picture of Silvia Saint from Leg World:
Forrest and I shot some stuff for Leg World back a while. The thing I liked best about that was having an excuse to buy amazingly cool hosiery. Anyone have any idea where I could find some legwear like Silvia Saint is wearing here? I might want to shoot for Leg World again. Okay, okay, really I just want them. So stockings store recommendations?
Forrest and I shot some stuff for Leg World back a while. The thing I liked best about that was having an excuse to buy amazingly cool hosiery. Anyone have any idea where I could find some legwear like Silvia Saint is wearing here? I might want to shoot for Leg World again. Okay, okay, really I just want them. So stockings store recommendations?
Tuesday, May 27, 2003
Here is some recent work from a shoot Forrest Black and I did on a recent trip to Las Vegas. It currently resides on BlueBlood.net and there is more from this set which is nice and naughty.
I wish we had more opportunities to shoot guys who look like this and I wish there were more venues to display cool photographs of gents.
--Amelia G
I wish we had more opportunities to shoot guys who look like this and I wish there were more venues to display cool photographs of gents.
--Amelia G
Sunday, May 25, 2003
My girl Szandora is in town, so she and Forrest Black and I headed out to see our friends from Dead Girls Corp play at Bar Sinister. Come to think of it, Grantor was in town from the UK last week for E3 and we also went to Bar Sinister then. Can't establish a pattern now. Here is a photo Tim took of me last week at the club (by the way, Tim positioned my finger and I am not actually flipping off Grantor):
Got to see really a lot of friends last night and met a bunch of new people including an LJ person who probably has a wicked hangover right about now (feel better.) It was a good turnout. TC gave me some good news about her new album. Met Toddy T's mom who had come out to the show and she told me how much she liked the photo Forrest and I took of Jen Vixen and Toddy for SWAG. For some reason, parents always really like our photos of their kids. Given that we shoot weirdos like ourselves, I don't know what intangible property about our portraits makes parents happier about them than anyone else's pictures, but I think it is a really good thing. Makes me very happy. Now if I could just get my parents to be vaguely impressed by . . . well, anything. I remember one of the last times I visited my parents in DC before my mom sort of retired and my dad was complaining about her coworkers holding up her schedule because they felt so impressed with themselves about the fact that they were having long meetings at the White House every night. So, basically, not holding my breath on the impressometer. Anyway, Szandora and Forrest and I managed to drag our asses out of the afterparty by the nice early hour of 4am so we would all be chipper to shoot today. Apparently my body has forgotten how to sleep properly and I have been up since 7:30am for no particular reason. Hmm, must forage for coffee and foodlike sustenance.
Got to see really a lot of friends last night and met a bunch of new people including an LJ person who probably has a wicked hangover right about now (feel better.) It was a good turnout. TC gave me some good news about her new album. Met Toddy T's mom who had come out to the show and she told me how much she liked the photo Forrest and I took of Jen Vixen and Toddy for SWAG. For some reason, parents always really like our photos of their kids. Given that we shoot weirdos like ourselves, I don't know what intangible property about our portraits makes parents happier about them than anyone else's pictures, but I think it is a really good thing. Makes me very happy. Now if I could just get my parents to be vaguely impressed by . . . well, anything. I remember one of the last times I visited my parents in DC before my mom sort of retired and my dad was complaining about her coworkers holding up her schedule because they felt so impressed with themselves about the fact that they were having long meetings at the White House every night. So, basically, not holding my breath on the impressometer. Anyway, Szandora and Forrest and I managed to drag our asses out of the afterparty by the nice early hour of 4am so we would all be chipper to shoot today. Apparently my body has forgotten how to sleep properly and I have been up since 7:30am for no particular reason. Hmm, must forage for coffee and foodlike sustenance.
Saturday, May 24, 2003
Tuesday, May 20, 2003
Robot Amelia Feels Sickened
Wow, I just posted something of personal importance to me. The folks who usually read my journal may be interested in my thoughts and my real life friends may care. Maybe people will comment with their perspectives. Kind of a cool system.
Only, as I hit post, I thought about the fact that some lawyer is likely reading it with an eye out for anything he can pounce on to ruin yet another day. Not that there was anything incriminating in it, but it makes me feel so self-conscious and ready to second-guess myself on anything I want to say.
It makes me feel sick. It makes me feel like not keeping a journal.
It makes me feel like I'm being pushed to just be some sort of creative machine. I feel like it is so extra-hard for me to just do regular person things. Between the stress and the weird watchful eyes, even though I was making a real effort to be sociable this week, I had a really horrible hit/miss ratio on my human contact. I'm hardly Madonna, so I really feel like I should have a bunch of houses and bodyguards before I have to deal with this garbage. Robot Amelia is supposed to create art people enjoy and support the scene and promote everyone in it and do favors for everyone in it, but I'm not supposed to be an actual person with actual feelings and thoughts.
Wow, I just posted something of personal importance to me. The folks who usually read my journal may be interested in my thoughts and my real life friends may care. Maybe people will comment with their perspectives. Kind of a cool system.
Only, as I hit post, I thought about the fact that some lawyer is likely reading it with an eye out for anything he can pounce on to ruin yet another day. Not that there was anything incriminating in it, but it makes me feel so self-conscious and ready to second-guess myself on anything I want to say.
It makes me feel sick. It makes me feel like not keeping a journal.
It makes me feel like I'm being pushed to just be some sort of creative machine. I feel like it is so extra-hard for me to just do regular person things. Between the stress and the weird watchful eyes, even though I was making a real effort to be sociable this week, I had a really horrible hit/miss ratio on my human contact. I'm hardly Madonna, so I really feel like I should have a bunch of houses and bodyguards before I have to deal with this garbage. Robot Amelia is supposed to create art people enjoy and support the scene and promote everyone in it and do favors for everyone in it, but I'm not supposed to be an actual person with actual feelings and thoughts.
The red pill or the blue pill?
A friend of mine mabe be about to go on an experimental antidepressant. I'm worried for him. All of that stuff gives me the willies. Culturally, it really bothers me that it is the goal of the brain care industry to make everyone functional but average. Want some Prozac? Just tell the nice shrink you are a lesbian. You'll be doped up in a jiffy. Hopefully, my friend will get the placebo in the experiment and just get hazard pay without the risk.
A friend of mine mabe be about to go on an experimental antidepressant. I'm worried for him. All of that stuff gives me the willies. Culturally, it really bothers me that it is the goal of the brain care industry to make everyone functional but average. Want some Prozac? Just tell the nice shrink you are a lesbian. You'll be doped up in a jiffy. Hopefully, my friend will get the placebo in the experiment and just get hazard pay without the risk.
Wednesday, May 14, 2003
Okay, so I'm trying to get some work done. The Spooky Links links section needs an overhaul. I need to delete links which are no longer good and I need to upgrade the script and I need to go through a backlog of links in limbo to get them approved or contact the link owners for whatever is missing etc. I'm not going to comment on the two most recent links added because I'm not sure what I could add:
Maybe I will work on something else for a bit.
Maybe I will work on something else for a bit.
Ya know, back when I was doing BLT in DC, there were always people who assumed that any pithy observation about human nature in the zine was about them personally. This, despite the fact that it was a punk rock zine where I and my witty chums were all entirely willing to name names and would have specified as needed. This is not a publication. It is just my journal where I jot stuff down that is on my mind, maybe to amuse my friends, but mostly to get it out of my head and so I can remember what I was thinking later. But, without a doubt, multiple people will get a bee in their respective bonnets thinking this last post is about them. Which is actually pretty funny. If you have a pretty dark sense of humor. And you look at it just right.
--Amelia G
--Amelia G
Feeling Guilty?
Wow, it is after midnight and I've pretty much done nothing so far today except let people get me down. Why do people who feel guilty about their own actions have to always add insult to injury? This is not a rhetorical question. I don't get it. I feel like maybe I should be more hostile when people do things to take advantage of me because, whenever I try to just let a slight slide, the guilty parties always have to be rude in addition to damaging. It is like they are sitting there waiting to be punished for their misdeeds, and they can't stand the suspense of waiting, so they have to push harder to provoke retaliation.
Wow, it is after midnight and I've pretty much done nothing so far today except let people get me down. Why do people who feel guilty about their own actions have to always add insult to injury? This is not a rhetorical question. I don't get it. I feel like maybe I should be more hostile when people do things to take advantage of me because, whenever I try to just let a slight slide, the guilty parties always have to be rude in addition to damaging. It is like they are sitting there waiting to be punished for their misdeeds, and they can't stand the suspense of waiting, so they have to push harder to provoke retaliation.
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