Ya know, I am human and I want to be loved just like everybody else does. But I don't want it bad enough to keep giving people more more more more more, when they do not return the favor.
I realize I'm ill and my foot hurts and maybe I am just feeling cranky, but I am really fed up and the thing where people do not seem to feel like giving me any slack when I have real problems, but I am supposed to jump every time their boyfriend of two days blows his nose . . . well, it pisses me off.
I am not an ATM, yet somehow I am always way up there on the list of who people call when it is time to make rent or bail or whatever.
I am all for punk rock barter, but not when the plan is why don't I give some band tons of free work and they might work for me for a discount. And not when the plan is why don't I promote someone's projects for them and they might want extra to model for me now that they are a name. That is not fucking barter. That is disrespectful and one-sided.
I am sick of people who get enraged if there is one damn person I know who I have not introduced them to yet, but who introduce me to almost no one. I am sick of people who want an invitation to any project I am involved in who do not involve me in theirs.
I am sick of girls who are bitchy because they think I am going to steal their man or their girl. If I wanted your man or your girl, I'd have them already.
I am sick of photographers who get my models so fucked up on drugs they end up hospitalized and unable to shoot with me. Or at least deathly sick and bloated with horrible skin and unable to shoot with me.
I am sick of people who look at sexuality in such an ugly way and have such poor powers of discernment that they can't look at a dressed photo I shot without deciding it is secretly explicit, just because I am good at what I do and so is Forrest.
I am going to go watch TiVo. I never used to be a TV person. Went years without having one which got reception. But I bet CSI and Comedy Central will disappoint me less than my fellow man.
