Thanksgiving

So I mentioned the Blue Blood Boutique to my mom and she acted like it was really weird that I would get into clothing. I pointed out to her that we sold thousands and thousands of Blue Blood T-shirts and such when I was doing the magazine version, so launching a similar project to go with the internet version was hardly a major departure. I was really excited that the hoodies totally sold out and had to be reordered almost immediately after launch. I wanted to tell my mom about a good thing which happened and she somehow managed to imply that me continuing successfully with a successful business was irresponsible. In case anyone was wondering why I am a workaholic, there is your explanation in one easy anecdote.

For some reason, this Thanksgiving time period was a weird alignment of planets such that I received really surreal emails and phone calls from more than a dozen people from various time periods in my life. The gist of all of them was more or less to check on our connection, emotional, artistic, or professional. A lot of them asked hard questions.

Only I took one day off for Thanksgiving and gave myself a few days slack around the time of Thanksgiving on messages or email. Plus my cell phone has been kind of jacked up. I should buy a new one, but I want to keep my number and this always involves me showing my cell company the error of their ways and compelling them to let me keep it. And I just don't have the time or energy for that right now. So, anyway, I took a few days where I didn't immediately compose responses to hard questions and every single one of these people started contacting me repeatedly. It kind of freaked me out.

I wish people could wait for others to think for a fucking minute before responding. Either that, or be more chill about what might be said off the cuff, without contemplation.

I feel like, in this digital age, a lot of people do everything under an anonymous cloak and deny responsibility. But somehow I didn't foresee the way most people would interact and every fucking thing I say goes down on my permanent record. Like other people can be egregiously two-faced and say the worst fucking things, but somehow it was just their internet avatar or something being a cunt, so all should be forgiven. But, if I am a bit short with someone one day, I will have to hear about it for fucking ever.

And here is another thing I hate about internet modes of communication. I feel like I can't type a list of my blessings here, but I can stand up and complain about my curses.

Which reminds me, speaking of curses, this chick I used to be friends with said something really stupid and hurtful and fake and I wished that being such a selfish phony two-faced idiot gave her the headache it would give me, if I lived in such a constant state of cognitive dissonance. And I just heard she has had a migraine for months, starting when I wished that.

I don't believe in magic, but I do get what I wish for pretty often. Except sometimes if I wish for the world to be a better place.

Sometimes I am really sad about lost human connections. I've moved so often. I wish I could go to a high school reunion, but my various high schools don't have them. At least, I don't think they do. I just got put on my university mailing list, but they mostly just ask me for more money and I kind of think the dough they got was already too much.

Anyway, I had a really great Thanksgiving with family and friends. And some damn good turkey and sides.

Just posted a new set to Blue Blood's GothicSluts.com which I'm pleased about. Second, potentially NSFW shot at this link and of course the whole series is on GS. I like a certain wild untamed quality of hers which I feel we were able to capture in this image.

I Am Lord Vader

I've been watching The Apprentice this season, both the Martha Stewart and Donald Trump version. Trump is so out of patience that he is 4 or 5 people ahead on the firing process. I wonder how they will deal with it when he runs out of job candidates. The last two contestants have five weeks of competing head-to-head? Four clip shows? The Star Wars episode was not the best episode they have had by far as the contestants just were not very creative or teamwork-oriented on either team and I like episodes which I feel teach something more than this one did. But the trailers for it on the show's site are awesome. Gotta love the Death Star project and costumed characters in a corporate business setting.

Someone who I adore (who I work with) called me "Lord Vader" the other day. I think I am flattered. Not sure if I should be, but I am.



I'm pretty sure I should be.

Argh

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Please Remember to Vote

Hey there, Californians, please remember you have until 8pm tonight to vote on a number of important ballot initiatives. You can find your polling place by going to LAVote.net and entering some address information for where you are registered.

There are a number of initiatives which would amend the California Constitution, including one, #73, which would add the language "unborn child, a child conceived but not yet born" to the state Constitution. There are a number of initiatives which could have a huge impact on education in California, as well as initiatives on alternative forms of energy and unnecessary and expensive redistricting.

You can check out the pros and cons for all the propositions, along with helpful links to partisan websites from both sides of each issue, at CalVoter.com.

Please remember to vote. You might feel like a drop in a bucket, but you are an important drop, and voting is a small price to pay for all the benefits of being part of a free society. Maybe it is corny for me to feel that it is everyone's civic responsibility, but voting is everyone's civic responsibility.

Hottie Blue Blood Chaotika Represents!

Full free gallery of photos of everyone's favorite Vegas pixie at the Blue Blood Boutique.

Doggie Tees!

Due to Kellie's influence, the Blue Blood Boutique now offers badass doggie tees for adorable doggies like Pika!

Ernie You scored 35% Organization, 68% abstract, and 52% extroverted!

This test measured 3 variables. First, this test measured how organized you are. Some muppets like Cookie Monster make big messes, while others like Bert are quite anal about things being clean. Second, this test measured if you prefer a concrete or an abstract viewpoint. For the purposes of this test, concrete people are considered to gravitate more to mathematical and logical approaches, whereas abstract people are more the dreamers and artistic type. Third, this test measured if you are more of an introvert or an extrovert. By definition, an introvert concentrates more on herself and an extrovert focuses more on others. In this test an introvert was somebody that either tends to spend more time alone or thinks more about herself. You are more sloppy, more abstract, and both introverted and extroverted. Here is why are you Ernie. You are both sloppy. You might not always know where everything you need is. Perhaps you don't even care. Ernie sure doesn't. Hey, when you got a best friend that is anal about cleaning you can afford to not worry about it. Sure Ernie likes taking baths, but that's just to spend time with his ducky. You both can be abstract thinkers. Ernie is a dreamer by nature, always making up songs while he plays. He comes up with fanciful adventures. You definitely are not afraid to take chances in life. You only live once. You may notice others around you playing it safe, but you are more concerned with not compromising your desires, and getting everything you can out of life. This is a very romantic approach to life, but hopefully you are also grounded enough to get by. You are both somewhat introverted. Ernie enjoys spending time with others, but he is also quite content to be in his own fantasy world with his duckies. Unlike Bert, he has other friends to spend time with. Like Ernie, you probably like to have some time to yourself, but you do appreciate spending time with your friends, and you aren't scared of social situations. The other possible characters are Cookie Monster Big Bird Snuffleupagus Oscar the Grouch Elmo Kermit the Frog Grover The Count Guy Smiley Bert If you enjoyed this test, I would love the feedback! Also if you want to tell me your favorite Sesame Street character, I can total them up and post them here. Perhaps your choice will win!

My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 9% on Organization You scored higher than 91% on concrete-abstra You scored higher than 30% on intro-extrovert

Link: The Your SESAME STREET Persona Test written by greencowsgomoo on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

Halloween Blues

Click if you are stressing about Halloween when it should be your very favoritest day of the year.

Alex & Kelly Are Awesome

Alex and Kelly had a pumpkin carving party.





Kelly is building cool stuff in his backyard.



Alex made spooky snacks. Let's hear it for severed finger sugar cookies and conglomerated munchie tarantulas (plus damn yummy ginger cookies!)

What creepy dessert goods will you be eating this Halloween season?

Fleshbot got excited with me about the Eros Zine feature!

Fleshbot got excited with me about the Eros Zine feature!



Eros Zine stays up for a “late-night chat on horror and hoochies, porn and perversion” with Blue Blood mistress Amelia G, who shares her thoughts on horror smut and explains some of the inspirations behind her stable of altporn and fetish sites: “I have a huge monster-fucking fetish … I think the notion of something which is so powerful it could destroy you—but chooses not to do so—is very sexy. Really it is a paradigm for love and I find that very hot.” (Which doesn’t really shed much light on the accompanying photos of various Blue Blood beauties dripping with stage blood. But we think they’re pretty hot anyway.)

Marquis

CLICK KELLIE'S LOVELY ASS WITH ANDY TO SEE A FULL DIGITAL PREVIEW:



Sometimes I find working on my Big in America column for Marquis really really hard. I mean, I love when the magazine comes out, but I find working on the project super tough.

Snarfed from Forrest's Journal

Just added some new t-shirt designs to the Blue Blood Boutique, in both regular, as well as super hot baby-t styles. I'm really pleased with the new designs and it's really cool to see folks out rockin the new stuff out on the street and in the clubs already.

Amelia G Hearts Thomas S. Roche

Whoo-hoo! An interview with yours truly is the lead feature on Eros Zine today!



The interview was conducted by the fabulously witty Thomas S. Roche. Here is his intro:

I first encountered Amelia G through Blue Blood, the magazine she and Forrest Black published starting in 1992 -- in other words, when dinosaurs roamed the Earth. In those days, the idea of combining horror, goth, sci-fi, comix, firearms, gaming, pornography and fetishism was just about unheard of. In fact, there were only a few dozen of us doing it.

Back then, I had like two professional publications plus a couple dozen pseudonymous porno novels and a substantial wad of published gay leather porn. The latter two categories I rarely bothered to tell anyone about, mostly because I kept writing porno books and stories and then forgetting about them as soon as I'd cashed the checks. I was far from being a high-profile writer. But the fact that I was so quickly welcomed into the fold -- despite my dorky eyeglasses and the fact that disks by Billy Joel sat between Jarboe and Joy Division on my CD shelf -- was testament to the fact that the goth/fetish/porn/BDSM/sci-fi/horror crossover community, in those days, was a very, very small world.

To be sure, sci-fi/horror and sex had enjoyed a long, lush flirtation, as had goth and horror -- the phenomena would explode over the next ten years precisely because fetish, fashion and fantasy are so undeniably right for each other. The BDSM community -- in San Francisco, at least -- was already overrun with comic-book-obsessed freaks of all genders whose pasts included frenzied adolescent wanks spurred on by everything from John Norman's Gor novels to Ziggy Stardust to Boris Vallejo to the Borg Queen to Frank-N-Furter to Darth Vader's erect syringe to Japanese anime to Philip Jose Farmer's Flesh. But at the time, the explicit connection of perversion, counterculture and science fiction/fantasy/horror drew puzzled looks from some fans -- and quivering streams of drool from others.

Blue Blood, along with Cecilia Tan's Circlet Press, Lisa Palac's Future Sex and Nancy Kilpatrick's The Darker Passions, among others, paved the way. Following close behind in a hurricane of mouth-breathing fanaticism were about ten bazillion pervy nerd boys and saucy geeksluts secreted after hours behind the gates of Ren Faires everywhere and locked in basements trying to rewire their N64s to shock their nutsacks. May the dark gods of science fiction fandom and eternal safe, sane and consensual torment just, oh, shower love upon you all. It makes me misty.

Anyway, screw the visit to the old folks' home. Let's talk monsterfucking.

Nowadays, horror porno is de rigeur, baby, de freakin' rigeur, but Amelia and Forrest are still crankin' out high-class commercial erotica with a countercultural edge and the flavor of damnation. In addition to Blue Blood, their sites include Gothic Sluts, Barely Evil, Rubber Dollies, and Scar 13, among others.

I caught up with Amelia for a late-night chat on horror and hoochies, porn and perversion.

You are going to have to visit Eros Zine to read Thomas's hysterically funny questions and my answers to 'em. Go there now.

PS The free photo gallery shot by me and Forrest Black which is featured with the interview is exclusive to Eros Zine for this fine holiday season, 2005. You gotta go there to view it.

Too Much Halloween

I love this time of year, but I'm feeling a little overwhelmed. I know I should just be happy, but it is a little too much. We sold out of the new Blue Blood Boutique hoodies the first week. I had to reorder everything and hope I get everything in time to keep people whose orders I haven't been able to send yet happy. I've got a deadline this week that I really don't feel like making. Actually, I've got four deadlines this week and one of them is cleaning up the mess made by someone else's shirking their responsibilities and one I just don't feel like doing in the midst of everything else. Had a great time bowling Friday. Was fun seeing Kellie while she was in town. Love my comfy hoodie. Have some great photos I just need to post. Am bleeding like a CSI episode. Had a nightmare last night which was sort of a cross between Martha Stewart: Apprentice and Ilsa She-Wolf of the SS and when I used to do contract design work. It sounds funnier than it was to experience. Started my day off-kilter. A bunch of people I like are having their relationships break up right now and I feel sad for them, even though, in some cases, I'm sure they will make positive new beginnings from the lemonade. Went to too many parties last night. Have too many parties and shows I want to go to this week and more work than I feel like I can do. Feeling overwhelmed is making me lower energy than I would otherwise feel I think. That and bleeding like a CSI episode. (I just had to say that twice.) There is just so much going on both workwise and funwise that I feel like I am always dropping the ball right now. I've got friends helping me with stuff and that is awesome. I should really just chill for a day and try to recharge. But I probably won't. Fuck I have a lot to do, but I just spent precious work and fun time freaking out in type instead. Blargh.

Cool Cityscape

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Announcement Snarfed from Forrest

Hey folks, I'm very excited to announce the opening of the
Blue Blood Boutique!
We're working on adding lots of cool stuff, in addition to the awesome new Blue Blood hoodies (as seen on the lovely Scar, below), stickers, and pins!







Free shipping available for larger orders too!
Check it out: http://www.BlueBloodBoutique.com

Chaotika is right thinking she is cool and sexy!

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Battle Hymn

I have PMS. I generally try to avoid anything which could be ruffling at such times. Apparently the world did not get the memo. LOL Can a journal be considered a memo to the world? Probably not. I hope not. I really don't post my ready-for-primetime thoughts here. I wish fewer people used this medium as a memo to the world generator. I really enjoy the concept of a diary which can allow feedback. But a diary does not equal a site. If I want to communicate a finished thought to hundreds of thousands of people, this is not where I would post it.

Late late night last night. Feeling very crusty today, but slept really well.

Actually, it is not just PMS. I mean, I do try to avoid conflicts if I fear my own reaction might be too strong or otherwise off. For a long time, I was holding my tongue on a lot of things because I wanted to avoid conflict. Not sure those two things go together though. Something for me to think about. In general, as time goes on, I like to reserve my energy for conflicts which matter and not just any old thing. I would rather create than battle, unless the battle is for something important i.e. good cause gets a battle hymn from me but baseless drama does not.

Pink!

There is a leopard-spotted pink paddle in my suitcase from Comic Con. I wonder who it could possibly belong to . . .